Run, Hillary, Run

In the midst of the immigration debate, Hillary Clinton felt compelled to grab the microphone yet once more to lament that H.R. 4437 would have made her a criminal, too:

“I realize I would be a criminal, too. My staff would be criminal. We help people with all kinds of problems.”

In a tendency brilliantly observed by Thomas Kuiper in his new book, “I’ve Always Been a Yankees Fan”: Hillary Clinton in Her Own Words, the senator from New York has always thought everything in politics is really about her.

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Building from the assortment of “Hilliary-isms” that Kuiper has selected for our amusement and instruction, we detect a strategy emerging for campaigning against Hillary.

An opponent would be well advised to pick any campaign issue and ask, “Well, Hillary, how does that make you feel?” Hillary’s Law of Politics No. 1 is that she will always have a sentiment, and that sentiment will be memorable, even if highly personalized or somewhat fictionalized.

Just take 9/11. Hillary had to tell NBC’s Dateline the harrowing story of how Chelsea had dodged death in the shadow of the about-to-topple towers. “She had gone on what she thought would be a great jog,” Hillary told the world. “She was going down to Battery Park, she was going to go around the towers. She was going to get a cup of coffee and — that’s when the plane hit.” Amidst (of course) the horror of 3,000 innocent murders on the first terror attack by radical Islamofacists on American soil, Chelsea’s close call with death became a major media story. Even Katie Couric was touched, noting about her friend Hillary, “At that moment, she was not just a senator, but a concerned parent.”

Following the trail of the “it’s all about me” Hillary rule, Matt Drudge on Nov. 9, 2001, pointed out that unfortunately Chelsea herself had a different story. It turns out that at the time the airplanes hit the buildings, Chelsea wasn’t saved by divine providence and a sudden urge for caffeine. On 9/11, Chelsea was safe in a friend’s apartment on Park Avenue South, miles away. “I stared senselessly at the television,” Chelsea wrote in an essay for Talk Magazine. Chelsea might have seen the smoke on TV, but she didn’t smell the smoke and hear the rumble from her coffee bunker in Battery Park, as Hillary told Dateline.

Remember, everything that happens in politics is all about Hillary, even 9/11. Hillary knows why Cardinal Roger Mahoney told Catholics to engage in civil disobedience, because she too was guilt of kindness, evidently to illegal aliens. Yet, dare we ask, “Does Hillary actually know any ‘undocumented migrants,’ first-hand, as friends or associates, or maybe as employees? Or is she imagining again, off once more in ‘Feelings Land’?”

As Thomas Kuiper so wonderfully points out, Hillary Clinton can always be counted upon to be a Yankees fan (unless, of course, it’s her day to be in Chicago). The book itself may cost $12.95 in bookstores, but as they say, the cover photo of Hillary pointing to her Cubs baseball hat is priceless.

It’s all about how you feel, that day that moment, don’t you get it? It’s pure Baby Boomer logic at the extreme, where everything is all about “me,” isn’t it? Sure, we all know the junior senator from New York is a Yankee’s fan, unless that day she happens to be in Chicago.